Day 17- Sober October Journal

Hello everyone!

How is it only day 17? I’m just kidding! This month is flying by so quickly and I am still going! We are talking.. no alcohol, no junk food, fasting after 8PM and being overall sensible with eating. My skin is happy. My tummy is happy and my family is happy.

Since my last journal post…Sunday night went really well. This was the night I mentioned that I was nervous over- the night we were going to the movies with friends. Well, we all got together for dinner before the show. We decided on taking in pizza at our friends’ house. On our way over we grabbed cookies for the kids and drinks, lemonade for the kids and ginger lime mule seltzers for me.

It actually wasn’t a big deal that I didn’t bring a bottle of prosecco over, nor did I think about drinking. This is very much opposite of my usual behavior. I am not sure we have ever gone to the movies at night when I haven’t had a drink, like ever.

And it was a lot of fun!

The Joker was fantastic, and without spoiling it for anyone, I will say how much I liked it. What I liked most, aside from Joaquin Phoenix bringing such a complicated character to life, I liked how they shed some light on a social issue that ultimately gives flame to this delusional maniac. There are a lot of classic movie throwbacks-how it was shot and who made a cameo. I just loved it and hope you have seen it or get to soon. H I G H L Y recommend it.

After the movie, we headed back to our friends’. Which is kind of what I was avoiding. We got there and started on our fun of movie talk and joking around. We always have fun together. Then our friend grabbed a bottle of strawberry vodka and starting making herself vodka lemonades. She drank two before offering me one. I declined, telling her I was doing Sober October, as I drank a glass of sparkling water. No one talked about it but then again, other than her, no one drank anything but soda and water.

Being ‘so’ sober makes you see things differently.

Like.. selfishness and dependency.

—–

Monday we cleaned up the yard for a few hours before hitting some hiking trails nearby. What a gorgeous day! This was my gym day but swapped it for an active day. I think I like these type of days best. My husband does too as he started a run right after we got back as I dropped off the girls at field hockey!! He plans to run again tonight. Is this cause of me? Maybe!! He used to workout and run a lot when we met, but then we married and kids and he works A LOT! Which is good and meh. So maybe he now feels it’s time to change.. and you need to want change to carve out the time to do it.

—–

Here we are on Wednesday morning and I feel great. Seeing my husband this week actively putting himself out there makes me feel good. Not having a thought of a drink or eating junk, I feel real great. Like I’m actually living the great.

I mean, I know I am not an alcoholic because going without it would be unbearable and I’d of cheated by now, right? But I haven’t and I am not missing it. I am strong minded when I want to be, and I know my limitations. I barely drank to get drunk. That was never my thought. But my complacencies of always having a drink makes me think of how much damage I may have been causing myself. Being sober so far has me thinking.. Is my liver a mess? Is my heart ok? Am I damaging myself?

There’s a lot of feelings here I know I am exploring out loud. Just from a lifestyle challenge, guys. Crazy. But maybe this is what I wanted? Maybe this is what I need?

Well. I, unfortunately, have to work now. Boo. But continue sending me your good wishes, they seem to be working!🍀

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